Questions & Answers

These are some of the questions the students asked Barrington H. Brennen

Last question added on April 24, 2011

Send your questions to buildingthehotyou@gmail.com 

Questions below answered on April 5, 2010

1.  Do you believe in sex before marriage?  No.  The Bible clearly teaches no sex before marriage. Exodus 20:14 states "Do not commit adultery."  1 Corinthians 6:18 states: "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. [More].  Modern research tells us the sex before marriage does more damage that good.  Sex before marriage also increases the change of having sexually transmitted diseases.  See slide show Why Should I Not have Sex Before Marriage

2. Is masturbation wrong?  Yes, compulsive masturbation is wrong.  I do not recommend masturbation for singles at any age.   1 Corinthians 6:18 reminds us to flee all sexual immorality.  Is masturbation all that bad? Well, research tells us that many single Christian teenagers and young adults are feeding the sexual appetites through masturbation, thereby increasing their risk of sexual dysfunctions during marriage.  Masturbation is dangerous because it is addictive. No form of sexual addiction is healthy.  God never intended for the sex act to be a solitary experience served through masturbation. God designed sexual intercourse to be shared between a husband and wife as the highest expression of intimacy. Should Christian single men and women use masturbation as a means of releasing sexual tension to avoid fornication? Certainly not. With the addictive element and lust thoughts and transitory nature, I cannot recommend masturbating as a method for an occasional release of sexual tension. [More] Dr. Kraft continues in his book Whole, Holy and Sexuality : "Masturbation is particularly seductive because it is an easy and accessible way to reduce tension and to explore genital feelings and fantasies without interpersonal vulnerability, responsibility, and accountability. It seems we have a license to masturbate almost whenever we feel like it. We need not worry about other people or social consequences; it can be kept to oneself. Part of masturbation’s lure is the safe secrecy of fantasy; one does not have to risk rejection, embarrassment or failure. . . . Instead of engaging in mature relationships, the individual can create a world of make-believe, where anything is possible and there are not limits . . . Masturbation can numb the discomfort of emptiness and incompleteness and promises some semblance of being one with self and other. But these rewards are short lived. Masturbation involves a yearning for intimacy and completeness."

3. What will you do if you found out your daughter had pre-marital sex?  I would cry, get angry, shout up, pray, think, then speak.  She is still my daughter.  I will forgive her.

4.  Have you always felt God protected you?  No.  There were a few times I doubted God, but I quickly regained my senses and trusted Him again.  That's a part of being human.

5. What is illicit sex?  First it is sex with someone you are not married to.  Second, it is sexual activities that are not Christian.  For example, masturbation and anal sex.

6. How do you know when you need to get rebaptized?  When you have embarrassed Jesus and yourself publicly.  When you habitually, openly opposed Christian principles of living.

7. How old you have to be to have a girlfriend or boyfriend?  The truth is you can have a "friend" at any age.  However, the best time for a serious relationship is after the teen years and after high school.  One should be at least 21.

8. Could God be a woman?  I don't know.  It is not important to me.  We do know that there are a few times in the Bible God is described with feminine or motherly qualities.  The Scriptures themselves use language, images and concepts to describe the Divine presence of God that include both masculine and feminine qualities. In the Bible we read that God is like a loving father, a courageous warrior, a good shepherd, a mighty king, a passionate lover.  But God is also like a mother eagle, a woman in labour, a midwife delivering a baby, a nurturing mother feeding her infant at the breast.  Luke 13:34-35

9.  Does God really answer prayer?  Yes he does. John 9:31.  1 John 5:14-15. Jeremiah 29:13

10. How do you know when God is speaking to you?  When you heart is open and free to listen to him.  When you are humble enough to admit that you are a sinner - weak, stupid, or unable to live without him.  It is called total surrender.

11. If Jesus knew that we would sin, why did he create us?  This and other questions like that have been asked for hundreds of years.  I would like to ask Jesus this question.  However, it was because of love, total love, that we were created.  Remember, God did not mess up.  We did.

12.  Why do we have to be like Jesus?  Because He is our creator and example. It is simple.

13.  How to resist peer pressure?  Believe in yourself?  Trust in God.  Admit that you can fall before you do, then you may not fall.   Select close associates that will not tempt you to do wrong?

14. How do I get close to God?  Bible study and prayer.  Personal witness and sharing his love to others.

15. If you only pray every day can you still go to heaven?  No.  "Faith without works is dead."  If you have faith in Jesus, you will show it to others by being kind and loving. James 2:14-26

Questions below answered on April 24, 2010

16.  What is illicit sex?  the world "illicit" means "not permitted or allowed" or "illegal."  Illicit sex would be any kind of sex done outside of marriage.

17.  Is it wrong to have a boyfriend/girlfriend?  No.  It is not wrong, as long as he or she is just a friend.  However, it "boyfriend" means that it is a permanent-like, intense, love relationship, where go cannot sleep at nights unless you speak to each other and the relationship prevents the development of other friendship, then it is wrong.  That kind of relationship is only for adults.

18.  How do resist peer pressure?  You cannot resist peer pressure by yourself.  Jesus in you will be the power to help you resist negative peer pressure.  When you let Jesus take control of your life, pray and read the Bible each day, you will be filled with the spirit that will fight the negative peer pressure for you.  "I can do all things through Christ who give be strength . . ."  Phil 4:13

19.  Why did God send our souls to earth?  God did not send our souls to earth.  You are a soul.  "The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being." Genesis 2:7.  The Bible also says that "The soul who sins is the one who will die." Ezekiel 18:20.  These verses suggest that the person is a soul.  The soul is not another part of a person.

Send your questions to buildingthehotyou@gmail.com