Please, Make Up Your Bed!
Barrington H. Brennen, MA, NCP, February 26, 2019
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What
should be one of the first things one should do when one
wakes up in the morning? It should be to make up one’s very
own bed. For most of us, the “first-things-list” might be
a little long--pray, brush your teeth, drink water, go to
the bathroom. But for many, one more item must be
added—making up one’s very own bed. Why is this so
important? Some might even think that making up one’s bed
is trivial or demeaning. In this article, I will seek to
stress the utmost importance of making up the bed in which
one sleeps first thing in the morning.
A big mistake parents
make is not insisting or requiring their children to make up
their beds first thing in the morning. Some parents might
think it is not important or do not have it on the list of
morning priorities. The rush for school or work is a
convenient excuse. Here are more poor excuses: There is a
helper in the home who makes us the beds, school is more
important, he/she wakes up too late before going to school.
One teen said: “Why should I make up my bed when I am going
to use the bed first thing when I get home from school?”
These are all diversion tactics.
Let me make a little
clarification. For adults who are married or living with a
partner, it is a great idea to agree between each other, as
most of us do, that the last one who gets up is the one who
makes up the bed. Also, the understanding about
collaborative responsibilities in the home facilitates an
attitude of cooperation in everything, including making up
the bed in the morning.
In
this article, my deepest concern is about toddlers to
teenagers and even young adults who live at home with their
parents. It is common in many homes that these are the
ones who do not make up their beds in the morning and are
not asked to or required to do so. It is my view this is a
great error in parenting or home management.
Why is making your
one’s bed first thing in the morning so important? Here
are four reasons. (1) It’s a tool for developing
self-discipline. Personal discipline or total
self-government is one of the most important tools a parent
is to instill in their offspring. It is the foundation
needed to face the world. (2) It teaches about the
importance of setting priorities. Ignoring the simple or
seemingly unimportant things in life prepares the child to
ignore proper care of one’s environment, orderliness, and a
sense of beauty. (3) It teaches about community involvement
and team play. Living as though one is a part of a
community—home, neighborhood or country—is an integral
ingredient of personal growth and comradery. (4) It helps
one to understand that starting with the simple tasks in the
morning sets the tone for the rest of the day. As inferred
in the other three points, when one ignores this simple
task, it impacts one’s ability to handle the bigger tasks
for the rest of the day.
Recently I came across
a video by a United States Navy Seal Admiral who was
speaking at a Navy Seal graduation. He shared this with the
graduate: “The ten lessons he learned from basic shield
training.” The first lesson he shared was that the first
thing in the morning every soldier in training was required
to make up his bed. He wondered at first why the soldiers
who were being trained to be tough fighters had to do such a
seemingly mundane task every morning? It did not take him
too long to learn the important lessons. He said to make
your bed every morning you will accomplish the first task of
everyday. It gives you a sense of pride and encourages you
to do another and then another task. That first little task
would have multiplied into other important and even more
difficult tasks throughout the day. The Admiral also stated
that making up one’s bed in the morning helps one to
appreciate that little things matter. He stressed that if
one cannot appreciate the little things, it will be harder
to do the more difficult things in life. I loved his
ending words: “If you want to change the world, start off by
making your bed.”
Parents make changes
in your home today. Require your children to make up their
beds first thing in the morning and to change their own
beddings when needed. You will begin preparing your
children for the world ahead.
Barrington H. Brennen, MA, NCP, BCCP, a marriage and family
therapist and board certified clinical psychotherapist, USA.
Send your questions or comments to barringtonbrennen@gmail.com
or write to P.O. Box CB-13019, Nassau, The Bahamas, or visitwww.soencouragement.org
or call 242-327-1980
