Making Weddings Sacred Once More - Part 2

By Barrington H. Brennen, 2007, 2017

 

Dear Sir: I attended a wedding ceremony a few weeks ago at a respected church in my community, and I was disturbed by the secular music used and the extravagant, sensual dresses and suits worn by the bridal party. It seems as if getting married is a big party rather than a sacred service? What do you think?

Answer: Last week I shared my concern about the secularization of the wedding ceremony with the use of romanticized secular music and immodest attire. I pointed out that the wedding ceremony is a sacred worship service where sacred hymns and tunes are used to glory the God of the creation and marriage, who is the source of eternal love, the only basis on which marriage should be built. The wedding dress should also be a celebration of God’s beauty and decency, not a fashion show of extravagant and indecent attire.

WHAT TYPE OF MUSIC

What type of music should we use at the wedding ceremony? There are at least two ways to decide what music is appropriate for the wedding ceremony. 1. The music should speak of God’s love displayed through Christ. The words should not be talking about a romantic encounter between two individuals, but a spiritual relationship between God and the couple. 2. In addition to the sacred words, we can determine if the music is appropriate by the way it is generally used and accepted in society, and how it is written. There are many lovely tunes that are well written but are commonly used to extol romantic love. They are most accepted in the secular realm and not the sacred. These tunes should be left out of the sacred worship service. The wedding reception is the place where romantic tunes are appropriate. However, music at a Christian wedding reception should speak about the true meaning of love and marriage. Even classical music should reflect sacredness in the wedding service. Some classical music pieces are not suited to worship God.

The use of hymns, sacred classical pieces, and gospel tunes are most appropriate for the wedding. Remember one is not limited to one style of music. There are very good sacred wedding songs from many cultures: Caribbean, African, South American, and European. However, whether the music is contemporary or traditional, it should extol God’s love in marriage. Here are samples of traditional and contemporary sacred songs for the wedding. This list is not intended to be an exhaustive list but only to give an idea of the type of music that is most appropriate for the Christian wedding.

Congregational Hymns

Love Divine

O Perfect Love

Great is Thy Faithfulness

Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee

Savior Live a Shepherd Lead Us

Fairest Lord Jesus

For the Beauty of the Earth

He Leadeth Me

Glorious Things of Thee are Spoken

 

Solo/Choir Suggestions

The Prayer

You Raise Me Up

Entreat Me Not to Leave Thee

The Greatest of These Is Love

Praise Ye the Lord

The Lord’s Prayer

If with All Your Heart.

Here We Are

When Three Become One

Love Will Be Our Home

Bone of My Bone

Processional/Recessional

Trumpet Tune

Toccata in B Minor

Trumpet Tune and Air

Wedding March

Adagio in A Minor

Sample of musical pieces not appropriate for the Christian wedding ceremony are Babe, When I'm with you, Baby, I do; Endless Love; Forever In Love, Innocent, etc.

Dear reader, let’s help to make the wedding ceremony sacred once more. Let’s put Christ back into marriage. The first place to begin doing this is in the service that joins two into one. Remember, the wedding is a sacred solemn worship service. Never forget it.

 

 

Barrington H. Brennen, MA, NCP, BCCP, a marriage and family therapist and board certified clinical psychotherapist, USA.  Send your questions or comments to barringtonbrennen@gmail.com  or write to P.O. Box CB-13019, Nassau, The Bahamas, or visit www.soencouragement.org  or call 242-327-1980.