Once again I want to remind parents about the effects
of television and other digital devices on the sexual development of their
children. Several years ago I shared on this
subject and I will present a few excerpts from that
article.
Since I wrote that article on television and sex,
more gadgets have been developed by which children
and accessing images, games and videos that are
impacting their little lives negatively. Now there
is the iPad, iPhone, smart phones, Kindle, Surface,
and much more. Therefore, when I use the word
“television” in this article I am referring to all
of these gadgets.
These little gadgets are in the
hands of little one who are mastering the skill to
maneuver difficult menus to get what they want. I
see little children 2 to 5 years old who are walking
around while they navigate these little gadgets.
While on one hand it is great to see our little ones
developing skills that are needed to navigate this
digital world we live in. On the other hand the
accessibility to negative information is just at the
slide of a figure to on a screen. Unless these
gadgets are being monitored by adults, our children
are being introduced to hours of sensitive,
action-packed, and often sexually suggestive
information.
“Television is perhaps the most powerful force today
that’s negatively affecting the minds and future of
our children. It is feeding their minds with sexual
images and ideas that leave them mentally and
emotionally crippled. Our little children are
spending too much time watching the glass tube. In a
recent survey I conducted, I discovered that on an
average, a Bahamian child watches at least 3.8 hours
of television a day, more than 30 hours a week, and
more than 105 hours a month. That is a total of 1280
hours of television a year. These are certainly
modest figures, for there are a great number of
children that watch television from the time they
get home from school until they fall asleep at
night. Still other children say that they "cannot
sleep unless the television in on." This would mean
that in many cases our Bahamian children are
watching up to 6 to 8 hours of television a day,
totaling to about 3000 hours of television viewing a
year.
How do these figures compare to other social and
family activities of the child’s world? A typical
Bahamian child who watches television a lot gets an
average of 4 to 7 hours of sleep per night. This is
not enough sleep. For normal healthy growth,
children between the ages of 5 and 12
should get
between 9 and 13 hours of sleep per night. Lack of
sleep leaves our little children irritable,
troublesome, edgy and difficult to deal with while
in school. Our Bahamian children spend about 3 to 4
hours a week eating; 30 hours a week in the class
room with the teacher, and only 1 to 2 hours a week
in total one-to-one communication and personal
interaction with their parents. To compare these
figures, our children are watching up to 3,000 hours
of television a year and are spending only less than
100 hours per year in personal interaction with
their parents. This is pathetic. Now we can see why
our children are so troublesome.
SEX ON THE SCREEN
The most talked about and demonstrated subject on
television is sex. It is even on the "good" shows
that our children watch. It is in the language of
the dramas, cartoons, comedies, soap operas, etc.
When our children watch these pictures every day or
week, they are fed information prematurely that
leave them stimulated, excited and inquisitive. A
daily dosage of these programs is damaging to the
mental and sexual development of our children. These
programs demonstrate adolescent children (preteen
and teenagers) involved in romantic relationships on
each show. The teenagers kiss, caress and talk a lot
about relationship issues. The little child’s
unconscious mind cannot distinguish between acting
and the real world.
Therefore, a daily dosage of
these shows gives him the impression that what he
sees on the show is for real. Secondly, everybody
laughs at the foolish gestures, sly remarks, and
suggestive sexual material. Thus, we become
desensitized to the wrongness of early kissing,
petting and premature romantic relationships. Our
little girls and boys are learning that it is all
right for a 10-year-old to kiss. Our teenagers learn
that it is normal to have multiple relationships and
be sexually involved. By the time our children reach
the age of 18, they would have watched at least
93,000 scenes of suggestive sexual activity on
television. Too many of our little children sit and
watch the deep heavy breathing, long intense
kissing, and passionate clothes shedding. Although
they may not see the actual sexual act, they see
enough to leave a permanent impression on their mind
of what sex is all about. Our children
get a daily
dosage of this kind of activity much too early in
life.
WHO IS THE BOSS?
Who is the "boss " in your family? Is it mom and
dad, the children, or the television/iPad/Smart
Phone? Do you
know what your children are watching or playing? Do
you have time limits for television viewing? Do you
sit with your children when they watch a movie or
play a game? Do you use television to baby sit your
growing child? Parents must deal with these
questions and more to make a change in the way their
children are being raised and influenced by the
television.
Parents, it is now time that you turn off the
television (gadgets) and proclaim a
television/gadget black-out week or month in your
home. Remember that the lack of television will not
make your children illiterate. However, too much
television certainly will.
Take the television out
of your child’s bedroom. If you have more than two
televisions in the house, sell them and put the
money toward the child’s school fee. Limit your
child’s television viewing to no more than one hour
per session. Select lots of nature pictures that
portray natural animal life. Do not use television
as a reward or punishment. Encourage your child to
spend her free time in activities such as sports,
hobbies, playing with friends, or reading rather
than sitting in front of the tube.
Take a piece of paper
and write down (or print out) the following message then stick it
on your television or on the iPad screen:
Warning!
Unwise use of this
television/gadget may be hazardous to your mental,
physical, social, sexual and spiritual health.
It
may cause fatigue, anxiety,
undue stress, laziness,
and
premature sexual appetite.
Barrington H. Brennen is a marriage and
family therapist. Send your
questions or comments to
question@soencouragement.org or call
242 -327-1980 or 242-477-4002 (WhatsApp)
or Visit
www.soencouragement.org.org
